Puerto Rico is completely trashed, and I mean completely, so we head home. I end up getting a lecture about Appleface from my boys. What was mentioned? Most namely my ability to pick up hotter women than her, so why even deal with her anyway? It was also mentioned that she doesn't respect me, and is too quick to jump to her own conslusions. Of course my boys would love nothing more than for me to break it off with her. For the next four days, we end up arguing.

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January 6, 2009:
I can do this. Leaving work today, I felt like a zombie – just going thru the motions. Get on the bus, get the car, drive home…..My mind is screwed up anymore, I can’t concentrate at work or think at all.
This log is not detailed. It is only for confidence to do this. The future holds even less than what I have today.
It is 6:40pm, about hour and a half to go. God have mercy. I wish life could be better for all and the crazy world can somehow run smoother. I wish I had answers. Bye.

It is 8:45PM: I chickened out! Shit! I brought the loaded guns, everything. Hell!

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You should know that I don’t really fuck around with black girls because I rarely run into any. They’re tugging on their friends because you are in a superficial club and to be honest, they probably don’t see you as a guy in their league. As for dealing with friends, I’ve said this time and time and time again: if the friends don’t respect you, then you won’t get the girl. In other words, you need to acknowledge the friends and just try to have a good time with them.