Are you a girl that is just waiting for Prince Charming to kneel down, present you with a perfect red rose (complete with water drops on the petals) and utter the words "Will you marry me?"
Well then, do I have the book for you - The Rules , a US phenomenon.
Groups of girls out there - all with marriage on the mind - are joining forces and following the commandments outlined in the book The Rules by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider.
It is like a secret girl group. With rules set in place such as "Never, ever call him", "Never accept a Saturday date after Wednesday" and "Always end a date first" these call for a lot of self-discipline.
Maybe it is a good thing for those of us who enjoy the odd challenge but be warned: you will deserve a medal if you make it through.
Even if you don't wish to follow The Rules, this book will give you an interesting insight to the little things that supposedly have guys grovelling for more. It is all about mind games and the thrill (!) of the chase.
Imagine you have been staring at the phone for three hours just waiting for him to call. When the phone finally rings, The Rules state that you let it go through to the machine because you don't want to make it seem as if you were waiting to hear his voice! It is a way of becoming aware of your own actions and how they can implicate situations. How you can be in charge.
For me, there is too much effort involved and too much to remember to become a Rules girl. If you find it hard to stick to the basic rules of society such as, single file when on an escalator, then these rules will be a challenge!
Some of them make day-to-day living very hard and well, totally unrealistic! For example, the "Never talk on the phone to him for more than 10 minutes" rule. What?
What happens when you finally do get married? He, all of a sudden, finds out that you don't have a 10-minute time limit when talking to him! This means sacrificing your weakness for inane chatter to impress. That alone ruled out this thing ever working for me!
Still, The Rules is great fun and well, if it works for you, then it is an added bonus.
Girls have been said to have married within a year after following The Rules. (How did they find a reception centre free?)
While we can sit and debate the pros and cons of such literature, many women see The Rules as a chance to call the shots!
As the title suggests, it is all about capturing the heart of Mr Right. (What happens to us if he isn't Mr Right?)
The feminist debate has been running wild but it's not just marriage-obsessed women who are reading this book. Even men are reading it to try to learn in advance how to play the game.
The writers say they receive hundreds of letters and e-mails each week from girls who follow the book and claim success.
It is surprising to note that many girls find The Rules don't necessarily lead to their walking down the aisle, but at least give them a confidence-booster, shore up their self-esteem and give them strength and trust in themselves to make decisions.
If I had the patience, I would certainly love this book to work. We all would. But I'm a sucker for calling at the wrong time, saying what I want and talking too much.
That's the fun of it all and if we never did anything wrong in relationships then Tim-Tams would never have pride of place in all of our cupboards.
The Rules II has now been released with more secrets and rules to keep you going. You can also get instructional cassettes or have the authors consult you on your relationship woes.
By the way, as a rule-breaker, it may be interesting to note that I am still single…